Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Avoidance
The avoidance strategy for conflict resolution is one that I use a lot since I don't like conflict. I'm pretty much willing to do anything to avoid conflict with other people. Some people don't mind it, and even enjoy it. Buy, for me, I conflict and confrontation are very unsettling to me. It basically boils down to me wanting everyone to be happy. The book says the avoidance strategy "entails withdrawing from the conflict." This is a little different from the way I avoid conflict. I try to prevent conflicts from happening before they occur and escalate, but the book talks about removing oneself from the conflict altogether. If there is a problem with group members, I won't run away from it, but I'll try to help resolve it peacefully without creating any ill-will within the group. I've seen firsthand the kind of resentment from group members towards a person that avoids conflict altogether. I was part of a hockey team where one of the players was having problems getting along with the rest of the team. As the divide between the team and the player grew bigger and bigger, the player ended up alienating himself from the rest of the team; he stopped attending social events for the team, and he would sit in a corner of the locker room by himself without talking to his teammates before games. This is an example of how the avoidance strategy of conflict resolution can be detrimental to the group.
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Hi Burg! I enjoyed reading your discussion on Avoidance. I liked how you related your personal experiences of avoidance to help explain the effects it has on certain situations. Like yourself, I hate conflict and I try to avoid is as much as possible. When we do that, we are indeed acting upon avoidance which can be both bad or good depending on the situation. If you were to walk away from every problem that occurs, that would definitely be seen as a very negative quality. However, if you avoid conflict by making sure it doesn't happen in the first place, you're probably doing the group a favor which is a positive quality. I really liked your statement on how you prevent conflicts rather than run away from them. Those two types of avoidance you explained are completely different. You also wrote a great example of what can happen if you use avoidance in a detrimental way. The hockey player you described pretty much became alienated with the whole entire team because he continuously would avoid the issue without attempting to solve it. I think it is clear that if you don't take the step in solving a problem, avoidance can be quite dangerous and stressful towards a group your a part of. Great job on your post, you used a great story and your own personal experience to explain the concept of avoidance.
ReplyDeleteHey Burg! I like the concept that you chose to discuss this week! Nice example as well! I am kind of like you in that I like to avoid conflict as well. To me I feel like it is easier for me to avoid conflict cause I do not want to deal with it and how it can be positive because there is no acknowledgement of the issue. But I believe that avoidance is actually a negative thing because it can kill relationships and deepen the issue or problem. I personally am starting to try to bring forth the problem instead of avoiding it. Anyways, nice discussion this week.
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